


if ever I was running

by tattooedsiren



Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-12
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-26 04:41:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6224275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tattooedsiren/pseuds/tattooedsiren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Mike leaves Rachel at the altar, Harvey is there to drive him away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	if ever I was running

**Author's Note:**

> So I was inspired by a [certain scene](http://pearsonspecterlitt.tumblr.com/post/140466474958) in 5x16 and by some fabulous [tumblr](http://anakinskywlkcr.tumblr.com/post/140394523772/out-of-context-the-scene-with-mike-and-harvey) [posts](http://tattooedsiren.tumblr.com/post/140382286905/youwillalwaysenduphere-lmaaaaao-was-that-not#notes) and decided to write fic. This isn't an episode tag or spin-off of that episode, it's just a vague canon au where everything is the same but there's no trial happening.
> 
> This was supposed to be a short mini-fic to post to tumblr, but it kinda got away from me, hence me posting it on it's own and not on tumblr/all the words in the world may not be enough. 
> 
> Also I suck at titles. This was the least lame option I could come up with. It's from the quote “If ever I was running, it was towards you.”

It wasn’t that Harvey didn’t try. He did. He woke up that morning and got dressed in his best suit and went to the car club and drove himself to the church. He did all those things for Mike, because Mike was the most important person in the world to him, and when Mike asked Harvey to be his best man Harvey said yes and couldn’t understand why his stomach twisted as he said the word.

But then he made it to the church and he couldn’t bring himself to go inside and it all became so clear: the reason why he felt reluctant to be Mike’s best man, the reason why he’d had pretty much no part of the wedding planning, the reason why he couldn’t make his feet cross the threshold of the church.

He couldn’t watch Mike marry someone else. Not when Harvey was in love with him.

So he stood outside the imposing building, paralyzed, unable to go inside but reluctant to leave. He glanced at his watch and saw the hour tick over. Three pm. The ceremony would be starting now.

The sound of the heavy wooden church doors opening caught his attention and Harvey looked up, incredulous at the sight before him. Mike, still in his wedding suit, the one that Mike picked out on his own because Harvey made other plans for that day so he wouldn’t have to go, was walking down the steps, out of the church. Even though he knew what he’d find Harvey still glanced to Mike’s left hand. It was empty. Mike wasn’t married.

Harvey stood up from where he was leaning on his car, watched Mike come towards him. Mike wasn’t running, but he wasn’t idling either. He was determined, face to the ground as he made his way down the steps. It was only when he reached the bottom that he looked up and met Harvey's gaze. He looked scared and wondrous and said Harvey’s name, just once, a broken and pleading thing, and Harvey nodded, opening the passenger door and watching Mike slide easily into the car. Harvey closed the door behind him, and when he was walking around to the driver's seat the door to the church opened and Rachel came flying out, looking beautiful in her wedding dress, heartbreak etched on her face. She locked eyes with Harvey, and he was aware of more people spilling out the door - Rachel’s parents and their little PSL found family rushing out in confusion - but Harvey kept his eyes on Rachel, unrepentant. He could see the moment Rachel understood, and she broke down anew, but Harvey didn’t stay to watch, sliding into the car and driving them away as quickly as the speed limit would allow.

Mike didn’t say anything, so Harvey just drove. He was going to get them out of here, as far away from New York as he could, and it took nearly an hour for Mike to come out of his daze, for him to take in his surroundings.

“Where are we?”

“Right now, nowhere. But I have a house, upstate, and that’s where we’re going.”

Mike laughed, entirely without mirth. “I’ve known you for three years, how did I not know you had a vacation house?”

Harvey wouldn’t hesitate to say that Mike knew him better than anyone, but still, “You don’t know everything about me.”

Mike nodded, his expression becoming vague again. “I ruined my life.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I ruined her life.”

“No, you haven’t.”

Mike didn’t say anything again, and Harvey didn’t press the silence. His selfish reasons aside, he genuinely believed Mike did the right thing by not marrying Rachel, and one day not only would he realize that, but Rachel would even thank him for it.

It took another ninety minutes to reach his place, and Mike didn’t say a word the whole time. From the corner of his eye Harvey could see Mike starting to take in his surroundings, and by the time Harvey pulled into the long driveway Mike was unabashedly looking around. They came to a stop outside the house: it was large but not overwhelming, with a deep porch and surrounded by a beautiful garden at the front.

When they got out of the car Mike did a 360 turn and smiled faintly. “Pretty.”

Harvey returned the smile. “Thanks.”

Harvey led the way inside. He didn’t bother with a tour of the house, just led Mike straight upstairs to his bedroom. Mike followed like he didn’t know what else to do, and he stood in the middle of the bedroom while Harvey opened up the wardrobe and pulled out some clothes.

“Here,” Harvey said gently, handing over a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

Mike took them automatically, and Harvey made to leave but the sound of Mike’s voice stopped him. “Would you - I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Harvey was surprised, but he acquiesced with a nod. Mike didn’t change, just stripped off his jacket and tie, kicked off his shoes, and then he lay down on the bed. Harvey followed his lead, and similarly disheveled he joined Mike on the bed. Mike laid on his side, facing Harvey, who was lying on his back and staring at the ceiling. There was what felt like a gulf of space between them, and as much as Harvey wanted to reach out, to lay a comforting hand on Mike, they didn’t really do that. They weren’t the most physical of friends and he didn’t want to hurt or confuse Mike by touching him, even with the best of intentions, so he stayed where he was, concentrated on the sound of Mike’s not always even breathing.

“Thank you,” Mike murmured, and Harvey didn’t know if Mike was thanking him for the getaway or for bringing him here but it didn’t matter. His answer was still the same.

“You’re welcome.”

 

 

*

 

 

Mike managed to go to sleep, but Harvey couldn’t. His mind was too busy flying in a million directions at once. He wondered if this was what it was like for Mike with that brain of his. If so, Harvey didn’t know how he stood it.

When he was certain Mike wouldn’t stir, Harvey slipped from the bed and padded downstairs. He paid a woman in town to maintain the house in his absence, so there was little to do to prepare the house for their unplanned visit, but going into the kitchen he realized the one thing they would need was food. So he made a list of everything they needed before heading back upstairs to his bedroom. He changed quickly, quietly, and left a note for Mike just in case he woke up while Harvey was gone and started panicking. And then Harvey drove to the store, hoping he’d have enough time to grab everything before they closed.

 

 

*

 

 

Harvey slept in a guest bedroom - his father’s old room - and was woken in the morning by the sound of the shower running. He pulled himself out of bed and padded downstairs to get breakfast started.

He was halfway through preparing some breakfast burritos for them when Mike entered the kitchen. He looked better than he did yesterday - though he did still look tired he also seemed more settled. He was wearing the clothes Harvey had pulled out for him last night, and Harvey couldn’t help but smile to see Mike in his clothes, especially the Harvard tee.

Mike noticed Harvey’s expression, and looked down at his top before returning his gaze to Harvey, a soft smile on his face. “Oh the irony.”

Harvey chuckled. “I pulled that out at random. Maybe it was more like fate.”

“I don’t believe in fate,” Mike said, a hard edge to his voice.

Harvey raised an eyebrow at him. “Really? That doesn’t sound like you.”

“Well, if there is such a thing as fate it’s screwing me over.”

Harvey didn’t respond straight away, just finished making their breakfast and presenting a plate to Mike where he sat at the counter. “I’ve cursed fate a lot in my life, but I’ll always be grateful to it for bringing us together.”

It was Mike’s turn to raise an incredulous eyebrow. “You think fate is responsible for us meeting?”

“You _don’t_? Mike, how many things had to happen in both of our lives to get us into that room at the same time?”

Mike seemed to think about it, genuinely think about it, for a few moments. “Yeah,” he said, “I guess you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always?” Harvey joked, and it worked, startling a genuine laugh from Mike’s lips.

They continued to eat their breakfast in silence. Harvey wasn’t going to press the issue until Mike was ready, until he brought it up himself, so they ate in companionable silence and when they were both finished Harvey took the dishes to the sink and started washing them.

He could feel Mike watching him but tried not to buckle under the scrutiny. Finally Mike broke the protracted silence with, “Don’t you have other things you need to be doing?”

Harvey looked up at Mike. “Nothing that’s as important as this.”

Mike smiled softly. “What about work?”

“Still not as important as you.”

Mike just looked at him, like a slow realization was coming over him, as though he finally understood that Harvey meant it. He believed Harvey when he said Mike was the most important thing in his life. But then Mike’s wonder at this realization suddenly crumbled into something else, something like anxiety, as if he didn’t know how to handle the responsibility of it. And Harvey didn’t want that. Harvey’s affection for him shouldn’t become a weight on his shoulders, so he left the dishes in the sink, crossed the room to stand on the other side of the counter and reached out, placing his suds covered hands on Mike’s. “It’s okay, Mike. It’s all going to be okay.”

“I want to believe you.”

Harvey smiled gently at him. “Then do.”

 

 

*

 

 

After breakfast Harvey finally gave Mike the tour of the house. It only took Mike venturing from the kitchen to the living room to realize.

“This isn’t a vacation house,” he said, not even a question.

“No. No, it was my father’s house. He moved out here once he and my mother … well, he moved here when I was at Harvard and Marcus and I would try and come to visit him as often as we could.”

Mike slowly roamed the room, taking all the details in. He seemed particularly fascinated by the violin hanging on the wall, and when he turned to Harvey in silent question Harvey just laughed and said, “Don’t ask.”

Mike nodded and continued exploring. They made their way through the downstairs - the two living rooms, the library/music room, the dining room and bathroom - before heading upstairs. It was all bedrooms with the one bathroom, and when they stood outside Gordon’s room Mike noticed the unmade bed.

“You slept here last night,” Mike said, and it almost sounded like he was hurt by that.

Harvey nodded solemnly. “After you fell asleep I went out to buy us food. I didn’t want to wake you. You looked like you could use the sleep.” It wasn’t a lie, but it might not have been the whole truth either. At any rate, Mike didn’t need to know that.

Mike nodded, and then continued down the hall for the rest of the tour. Once they were done with upstairs they went out the back. The backyard was large, with grass that was dark green and looked soft to the touch. There was a gazebo in the back corner and a hammock between two trees. It looked like a garden that had been lovingly tended to.

“It’s so peaceful,” Mike said in a whisper.

Harvey nodded. “It’s my escape. Whenever the job was getting too much, whenever the city was feeling too oppressive, I’d come here. Spend some time with my dad, decompress. I have good memories here.”

Mike smiled at him. “Thanks for bringing me here,” he said, and Harvey knew he wasn’t just saying thank you for whisking him away from his abandoned wedding. He could’ve taken Mike anywhere in the world but he brought him here because he wanted Mike to feel that serenity he always felt as soon as he walked in the door. Looking at Mike, he thought maybe Mike was feeling some of it now.

 

 

*

 

 

It took until after dinner for Mike to talk to him.

They idled the day away, watching movies, going for a walk, talking about anything that wasn’t important, ignoring the ringing on their cells (until Harvey finally answered one of Donna’s calls and told her to not bother calling either of them anymore because _we aren’t in New York anymore_ and _no, I don’t know when we are coming back_ and _can you please take care of everything.._.). They made dinner together, moving around each other easily as they made tacos, and ate on the couch as Rosemary’s Baby played on the television.

“It didn’t feel right,” Mike said out of nowhere, and Harvey turned his attention away from the television, settled it easily on Mike. “Marrying Rachel. I was standing there, in the same church where my parents got married, and it was months of planning all coming to fruition, but it just didn’t _feel right_. I wanted to marry Rachel the moment we met, but standing there in the church, waiting for her to walk down the aisle, I had a pounding in my chest like I’ve never felt. It felt like a warning, a screaming in my soul not to do this, and I still don’t know why it happened but I had to listen. So I ran. I still don’t even know if it was the right thing to do.”

Mike’s eyes went wide on the last sentence, as though panic was starting to sink in, like he could end up regretting everything he did yesterday. Harvey kept his eyes locked on Mike, wanted to keep Mike here in this moment with him.

“You might know not why right now, but there was a reason your entire being revolted against the idea of marrying Rachel. I know you’re hurting, and I know that you feel badly about abandoning Rachel, but it’s okay to look out for yourself for once, Mike. Was it the best timing in the world? No.” And Mike managed a weak smile at that, which eased Harvey’s concern. “But if you weren’t certain then you shouldn’t’ve married her. Leaving _was_ the right thing to do.”

Mike let out a shaky breath, his eyes shining in the low light of the room, visibly relieved to hear Harvey tell him he did the right thing even though Harvey told him the exact same thing the day before. But that was okay. Harvey would tell him as often as he needed, until Mike believed it.

 

 

*

 

 

When they went to bed that night Mike hesitated outside the master bedroom door, like he wanted to say something, but in the end he just smiled and murmured a goodnight and closed the door behind him.

Harvey went to the guestroom and laid in his bed, unable to sleep, hearing Mike’s footfalls in the hall and trying to pretend he wasn’t waiting for something that he knew would never happen.

 

 

*

 

 

When Harvey got up the next morning Mike was already awake, and in a role reversal from yesterday he was making them breakfast.

“Morning,” Mike said.

“Good morning,” Harvey replied, taking a seat at the counter. He watched with interest as Mike moved around the kitchen. He seemed to be doing slightly better today. Harvey wanted to keep the upswing going.

“What do you think about getting out of here today?” Harvey asked after Mike presented him with a plate of French toast. It was delicious. “Do some exploring?”

“Sounds good. But first, I think we need to go shopping,” and he looked down at his t-shirt - _Harvey’s_ t-shirt - and Harvey chuckled.

“Probably a good idea.”

So after breakfast they headed into town and went shopping. It was all for Mike - Harvey kept a range of clothes at the house - so Harvey pulled clothes from the racks he thought would look good on him. There weren’t that many options, but they made do, and when Mike found a disgusting pea green shirt and begged Harvey to try it on for him Harvey just rolled his eyes and pushed Mike towards the dressing room.

They hit every clothes shop in the small town and left with enough clothes to cover Mike for a while, along with the basics like socks and underwear and toiletries, and they loaded it all into the trunk.

“So, where to?” Mike asked, his expression open if not entirely excited.

“The Catskills aren’t far.”

“I’ve always wanted to go.”

Harvey smiled, sliding on his sunglasses. “Okay, so let’s go.”

He’d spent a bit of time with his father exploring the Catskills, and he knew exactly where he wanted to take Mike. It wasn’t too far a drive to Kerhonkson and he parked at the trailhead on Upper Cherrytown. Mike was looking around him even as he got out of the car, drinking in the sights.

“Where are we going?” Mike asked.

Harvey smiled. “You’ll see.”

It was a few miles, but it felt good to be out in the fresh air. They took their time as they trekked along, Mike wide-eyed and wondrous the whole time. Harvey glowed to see him like this. Mike was fascinated by the ruins, and Harvey had to bodily pull him away, promising him that, “They’ll still be here on the way back.”

The trail was pretty deserted, which was nice. The sun shone down on them but there was a cool breeze in the air, a perfect day to explore. At last they made it to the waterfalls, and they just stood there in silence for a good five minutes, taking everything in.

“It’s beautiful,” Mike finally breathed out.

“It’s one of my favorite places,” Harvey confessed. Mike turned to face him and Harvey continued, “My dad and I came here a lot. He told me he always felt inspired by nature, that he heard melodies in the sound of the rushing water or the breeze in the treetops, and we found this spot one day and I just fell in love.”

Mike’s smile was the brightest Harvey had seen in days. He turned his attention back to the view and said, “I wish I had my camera on me.”

“Your camera?”

“I’ve been taking photos all my life. Haven’t really had much of a chance to since I started working for you, time constraints of being a fake lawyer what they are. But I miss it. And this view...” he held his hands out at arm's length, made a rectangle with his hands and looked through them, “would make a beautiful picture.”

He dropped his hands and glanced at Harvey, who was staring unabashedly at Mike, this person whom he loved more than any other.

Mike chuckled. “Guess you don’t know everything about me either.”

“Guess not,” Harvey agreed with a smile. “But I’m learning.”

 

 

*

 

 

They spent the afternoon exploring, and decided they couldn’t be bothered cooking so went out for dinner. It was a small restaurant but the food was delicious and the atmosphere relaxed. Mike was smiling freely throughout the meal while they talked about anything that came to mind, and Harvey knew he’d be okay.

“So, where are we going tomorrow?” Mike asked.

Harvey grinned. “Anywhere you like.”

 

 

*

 

 

Harvey slept in the next morning. Must be being back here, his body and mind able to slow down outside the rush of the city, and his body was greedy with it, the respite and relaxation that came with being in his one true safe haven with his most favorite person in the world.

He showered and dressed before making his way downstairs. He was already thinking about where they could go today when he heard Mike’s voice. It didn’t take too long to realize that he was on the phone with Rachel, Mike sounding tense and regretful. Harvey backed away before Mike saw him. He knew Mike wouldn’t want him eavesdropping, and to be honest, he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear what they were talking about anyway.

He silently slipped from the house and went to his car. Although Mike and Rachel talking wasn’t an ideal situation - he could admit to himself that he worried that Mike would go back to her, and even putting his own feelings aside, he truly believed Mike didn’t belong with Rachel - it did give Harvey the opportunity to sneak out without Mike noticing.

He drove two towns over to a camera shop he had only ever seen in passing. He had no idea what he was actually looking for, but the sales woman was friendly and helpful and he hoped Mike liked their choice. She assured him it was a top of the line model, and Harvey didn’t even glance at the price, just put his faith in her and handed over this card.

The house was quiet upon his return, and he left the bag on the couch as he passed through the living room in search of Mike. He was sitting at the dining table, a room Harvey only remembered using a handful of times, his head in his hands.

“Hey,” Harvey said gently.

Mike looked up. He looked wrecked.

“Are you okay?” Harvey asked, pulling out a chair and sitting beside Mike.

He nodded. “I spoke to Rachel. We … well, cleared things up doesn’t exactly sound right, but we talked. I think we understand each other a little better now. She’s staying with her parents so when I get back the apartment will be … you know.”

Harvey nodded. “I’m sorry, Mike,” he said. Because he was, and he actually hadn’t said it yet.

“What are you sorry for?” Mike asked, clearly confused.

“I didn’t want this for you. I wanted you to be happy, and I’m sorry it hasn’t turned out that way.”

Harvey could see an infinitesimal quirk at the corner of Mike’s mouth. “Well, it’s not over yet, right? I still have a chance to be happy, don’t I?”

Harvey grinned. “Yes, you do. And to that end, I got a present for you.”

He held up a finger in silent request, which Mike obeyed, remaining where he was as Harvey went back into the living room to grab the bag. It was a plain black bag, so no clue as to its contents was to be given.

“Consider it a late wedding present,” Harvey said, placing it on the table in front of him. At Mike’s glare Harvey asked, “Too soon?”

Mike laughed lightly, which was the desired effect. “Asshole,” Mike murmured, but the word was thick with affection, so Harvey didn’t mind.

Mike reached into the bag and pulled the box out. Mike’s entire face twisted before Harvey’s eyes - surprise and wonder and gratitude and back to surprise again - and he didn’t even get the camera out of the box, he just rushed to his feet and threw his arms around Harvey. Harvey let out a noise at the sudden crushing of Mike’s body into this, but then he wrapped his arms around Mike, and they just held each other in silence, no words necessary.

 

 

*

 

 

Mike, no surprise, wanted to go try out his new toy. So they headed back to the Catskills, but a completely different area this time, and went exploring.

He took photos all day, of everything, from the gorgeous blue sky above them to a tiny detail at the bottom of a tree Harvey would never have noticed on his own. Mike absolutely glowed with it, and he told Harvey about taking photos as a kid, how his Grammy encouraged him to stick with it when he wanted to give it up after his parents death, so he did, not only for himself but for them too. His parents loved his photos, and he felt like it was a way to stay connected to them.

Harvey lost track of the time but he didn’t care. It felt like a rebirth, the two of them here, Mike doing something he’d always loved in a place that meant the world to Harvey. He’d watch Mike take a photo and then Mike would turn to him, smiling, and Harvey had the profound feeling of being exactly where he was meant to be in that moment.

By the time they were both ready to head home Mike pulled on Harvey’s sleeve and said, “But first, a selfie.”

Harvey rolled his eyes. “Pretty sure you can’t take a selfie on that thing.”

“Oh yeah? Just watch me.”

And Mike somehow found a tree that he could nestle his camera in and set the timer and dragged Harvey into frame, his arm around Harvey’s shoulder, and Harvey looked at the camera and grumbled, “Still not a selfie.”

Mike turned to Harvey and grinned, “Shut up, Harvey.”

The shutter went off.

 

 

*

 

 

Harvey called Donna the next morning to ask how things were going in the office.

“Well, there are a lot of rumors going around about you and Mike.”

Harvey rolled his eyes. “I don’t care about that, what’s happening with the work?”

“Jessica and Louis have split your more elite clients and anything else that needs doing is being split amongst the other partners.”

“Good.”

“When are you coming back?”

Harvey hesitated. Mike padded down the stairs and passed him with a smile on the way to the kitchen. “I don’t know,” he replied honestly.

“Harvey, we’ve been covering for you, but some of the clients are starting to get restless. I really think you should come back.”

“I can’t, not right now.”

“Mike’s leave was planned for their honeymoon, his work had already been redistributed. You left with no warning, Harvey. People are freaking out,” Donna’s voice was low, insistent, and Harvey knew that he should care about what was happening back at the office but the truth was, it felt good to not think about it for a while. He’d been going non-stop for too long. He deserved this.

“I’m sure Jessica and Louis can handle it.” There was a pause, and then against his better judgement Harvey asked, “How’s Rachel doing?” Because as much as Harvey thought she and Mike weren’t meant to be together he still respected her as a person.

“She’s got left at the altar, Harvey. She’s devastated.”

Harvey let out a deep sigh. It was the answer he was expecting really. He didn’t know why he even asked.

“What’s going on, Harvey? I know Mike’s your friend but nothing about this makes sense. Mike and Rachel belong together. Why did he do this? Why did you leave with him?”

Harvey would never tell her. What he felt for Mike, it had nothing to do with Donna or anyone else, and they didn’t get to know that part of him. There weren’t that many things that Harvey considered sacred but this was one. “Put me through to Jessica, Donna. And thanks for manning the decks for me.”

He heard Donna sigh, but she just said, “Putting you through now.”

There was a brief delay as his call was transferred, and in the silence he could hear Mike humming away in the kitchen. And then Jessica picked up with a, “Harvey what the hell are you doing?”

“Miss you too,” he said sardonically.

“I don’t have time for your shit, since one of the name partners up and left without a word and I’m covering all his work. Now you get your ass back into the office, _now_.”

“I can’t do that. But you can tell HR they can finally start paying me the vacation days I’ve been accruing for the last decade. Just keep an eye on Anna when you do - she has a weak constitution and may pass out from shock.”

“This isn’t funny,” Jessica's voice was hard, and Harvey let out a deep breath.

“Jessica, I have given my life to our firm. And now I’m just asking that the firm give me a little something back. Is that too much to ask?”

“Without warning, yes. What the hell were you thinking running off with the goddamn kid.”

“I was thinking that my friend needed me and I was going to be there for him.”

There was a pause that got more loaded the longer it lasted. And then Jessica, of all things, laughed. It was tinged with incredulity and resignation, but it was still a laugh. “Out of all the people in the whole world you had to go ahead and fall in love with your fake associate. Figures.”

Harvey seriously thought about denying it but figured it wouldn’t be worth the effort. “I’ll call you back in a few days to touch base, okay?”

“Sure, Harvey, you do that,” Jessica said, and then she hung up the phone before Harvey could. She always did have to get the last word in.

 

 

*

 

 

They wasted their days exploring. They went to different areas of the Catskills - both places Harvey had been before and places he had never seen. Mike’s camera was a constant fixture, and Harvey got to the point where not only did he not protest when Mike took a photo of him but he didn’t even notice. They also explored more of upstate New York, sometimes just getting in the car and picking a direction and driving with no destination in mind. They ate food both good and bad, and Harvey felt his body protesting at the heavy food and lack of exercise but he didn’t fucking care. Not when Mike was sitting beside him, looking at Harvey with a fond expression, smiling like there was no one else on this earth who could make him look that way.

 

 

*

 

 

They’d been in the house for a week now. This was the day Mike was supposed to be returning from his honeymoon and yet, somehow, the aborted wedding felt like a lifetime ago.

Living together with Mike like this had been an interesting experience for Harvey. For all that they’ve spent half their waking lives together since they met it’s different without the context of work. This is them sharing a bathroom and having to wash dishes and fighting over what to watch and it wasn’t that Harvey was surprised that it had gone pretty seamlessly, it was that he was relieved. Because after everything they’d been through, if their relationship became fractured for something as petty as leaving a wet towel on the floor, then Harvey would have to give up his entire faith in human relationships.

But that didn’t happen, his relationship with Mike didn’t suffer it only thrived, and having Mike here, in his father’s house, had just reinforced it: Mike was family.

To that end, Harvey thought it was time to introduce Mike to someone. So he said to Mike over cereal, “Mind if we take a bit of a detour this morning?”

“Sure,” Mike replied easily. “Wherever you want.”

The drive to the cemetery was familiar, and as soon as Mike saw the gates up ahead he glanced over at Harvey, who kept his eyes solidly on the road. He parked the car, and there was no one around as they made their way to the grave. Harvey could feel his chest constricting the closer they got, but he didn’t let that stop him. He could hear Mike’s footsteps from where he trailed behind Harvey, and he kept focused on that.

And then they arrived at Gordon’s headstone. Mike stood beside him, so close that their arms brushed on Mike’s every inhale, and they didn’t say anything, just stood there for a moment in silent contemplation.

“Tell me about him?” Mike asked at last, voice barely above a whisper.

So Harvey did. He told Mike whatever popped into his head, whether it was a story from his childhood or a tale Gordon had told him about life on the road or about how Harvey was supposed to be visiting him when he passed away and his biggest regret in this life was that his dad passed away totally alone when Harvey should’ve been there for him.

Mike reached over and laced their fingers together, and Harvey gripped them tightly in return.

“I wish I could’ve met him.” Mike said.

Harvey chuckled. “He would’ve loved you. He probably would’ve loved you more than me.”

“Oh I doubt that.”

“Well, maybe you would’ve been a close second.”

They shared a sad smile, and stood there together a few moments longer, hands still clasped together.

 

 

*

 

 

They spent the next day at home, which was fine with Harvey. It was surprisingly easy to fill the hours: they watched a movie and went for a walk and cooked lunch and curled up on the couch with a book each. And all day Harvey could feel Mike watching him when he thought Harvey wasn’t looking, like he was trying to work something out. Harvey did his best to ignore it, but when it continued after dinner Harvey finally caught his gaze and asked, “Everything okay?”

“Shouldn’t we be getting back to work?” Mike asked.

“I’m sure they have it handled,” Harvey replied, and went back to watching the movie.

 

 

*

 

 

Harvey dreamed.

He dreamed that Mike snuck into his bedroom late one night, sliding under the blanket beside him. He dreamed that Mike told him in a whisper _I think I know why I couldn’t marry Rachel, why my entire being revolted against the idea._ He dreamed that he replied with a sleepy _Yeah? Why?_ He dreamed that Mike smiled and told him _You_.

He dreamed that he reached out and touched Mike’s face, felt that smile beneath his fingertips, before Mike lay down beside him and went to sleep.

Harvey dreamed.

 

 

*

 

 

When Harvey woke up in the morning Mike was lying in the bed beside him.

Mike was awake, looking at him, and it took a few moments for Harvey’s brain to process what was happening and that’s when he realized.

“I thought it was a dream,” Harvey whispered into the quiet of the room.

“Good dream or bad dream?” Mike asked, tensing before his very eyes.

Harvey smiled softly. “Good dream.”

Mike smiled in return, and before he could over think it Harvey leaned forward, slowly enough for Mike to back away if he wanted, but Mike didn’t, and Harvey pressed their mouths together in a soft kiss.

Mike let out a noise that sounded like a soft sob of relief, and then he pressed forward, slid a hand around the back of Harvey’s neck and deepened the kiss. Harvey couldn’t think. Didn’t even want to, not if it meant considering anything outside of this moment. Mike somehow managed to move, to shift on top of Harvey while still remaining under the covers, all while kissing Harvey. Harvey slid his hand up under Mike’s tee along the plane of Mike’s back, their kisses deep and languid.

Mike broke away only to slip off his tee and then he was back, kissing Harvey like he couldn’t bear not to. Harvey was already bare-chested, and Mike’s chest was warm as it pressed into his own. Mike didn’t stop kissing him, just braced an arm beside Harvey’s head and used his other hand to slide his pants down. As much as Harvey was loathe to stop kissing Mike he really needed to if they were both going to get naked in an efficient manner, so there was a brief interlude as they pushed and kicked their clothes off until finally they were naked and pressed together once more, skin to skin.

Mike rolled his hips, their bodies sliding together in the most delicious way. Harvey moaned, fingers pressing into Mike’s hips in silent encouragement. Mike’s hands were pressing into the mattress on either side of him to keep himself braced above Harvey and he leant down to kiss Harvey but stopped at the last moment, both their mouths open and sharing the same air, and then Mike said in a low voice, “We’re going to be so good together.”

Harvey surged up to steal his mouth in a quick but dirty kiss. Mike moaned, and Harvey started meeting Mike’s thrusts, the friction so exquisite that Mike struggled to hold his own weight. Their chests pressed together and Mike panted into Harvey’s ear, “I can’t wait for you to fuck me. You’re going to feel so good inside me, Harvey.”

Harvey lost whatever small amount of brainpower he had left, letting out a guttural groan and flipping them over so Mike was on his back underneath him. Harvey moved against him and Mike cried out, eyes closed and head thrown back, so Harvey leant down and slid his mouth down Mike’s neck, swirled a tongue around Mike’s nipple as Mike arched beneath him.

“Do you want me to fuck you?” Harvey asked into Mike’s chest. He wanted everything with his man - he wanted to fuck Mike, he wanted Mike to fuck him, he wanted to taste every inch of Mike’s skin - and he’d gladly start wherever Mike wanted.

But Mike was shaking his head. “No, too long,” Mike rasped out. “I just want you to touch me. I want you to make me come.”

So Harvey did. He roamed his hands and mouth over Mike’s chest, he settled in the cradle of Mike's body and moved, his body rolling like waves upon the sand, and he kissed Mike like his life depended on it.

“Fuck, Harvey,” Mike moaned, his countering thrusts becoming erratic, fingers pressing into the globes of Harvey’s ass. Harvey got a hand between them and wrapped it around Mike’s cock, stroking him until he came with Harvey’s name on his lips.

Mike was a thing of beauty, lying underneath him, his long pale throat bared as he tried to regain his breath, and Harvey moved his hand to himself and got himself off in near record time. He collapsed beside Mike on the bed, breathless.

“Asshole,” Mike murmured after several long minutes of nothing but heavy breathing between them, which was not exactly what Harvey was expecting Mike to say. “You couldn’t wait for me, huh?” he asked, reaching over and slowly idling his fingertips up and down the length of Harvey’s spent cock.

Harvey chuckled. “Next time.”

“Promise?”

“Yes.”

 

 

*

 

 

They spent the day in bed, talking, fucking, talking again, and then more fucking.

Harvey had never spent the day in bed with someone before, and it was revelatory. He could reach out and touch any time he wanted to, and he did, often. Mike’s laugh was music in the air and the only hunger Harvey felt was for Mike’s hands on him.

“We could stay, you know,” Harvey whispered into Mike’s skin, long after the moon had risen in the sky.

“What do you mean?” Mike asked, the hands that were running through Harvey’s hair now still.

Harvey looked up, rested his chin on Mike’s stomach. “We don’t have to go back to New York. We could stay here, build a different life.”

Mike laughed, but then sobered when he realized, “You’re not kidding.”

“You’re a lawyer without a degree, Mike. Sooner or later we’re going to be found out: best case scenario is the firm implodes with the scandal, worst case scenario is you or I or both of us wind up going to prison. We could quit while we’re ahead, before they catch us and drag us down.”

“But you love your job,” Mike pointed out.

Harvey smiled softly. “You mean you still haven’t worked out that I love you more?”

Mike just looked at him, like he was waiting for Harvey to laugh and tell him he was joking. But he wasn’t. He’d never been more serious about anything in his life. He wanted a new life and he wanted it with Mike. And okay, maybe hiding away in this house wasn’t a viable option in the long term, but they’d figure it out. Maybe they’d do something related to the law in a smaller scale, maybe they’d branch out into a new business venture, hell, maybe they’d just get level entry part time jobs to get them out of the house. Anything and everything was open to them, and Harvey didn’t care where their working lives lead as long as he got to come home to Mike.

And then Mike smiled, slow and brilliant, taking Harvey’s face between his hands and guiding him up for a deep kiss. When it was over they didn’t move apart, Harvey pressing his forehead to Mike’s and letting out a deep sigh.

“Yes,” Mike whispered. “Let’s stay.”

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't tag this fic with anything because I honestly had no idea what tags to use lol. Now that you've read it if you have any suggestions I'm all ears. :O)
> 
> [tumblr](http://tattooedsiren.tumblr.com/) if you wanna come say hi.


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